I think I’m onto a conspiracy, here.
More and more, recently, I’ve been running into a specific type of person I call “new”. They come in all shapes and sizes, but more often than not it’s a specific type of flighty girl that seems to pop up more and more frequently around me as of late. You can usually tell them by their dress and complete obliviousness to everything that’s happened in the world as of one week ago. It’s as if they’ve just stepped off their spaceship moments prior to meeting you. Their presence would be stranger if it didn’t make life so goddamned interesting.
They step out of their apartments wearing rain galoshes, tutus and scarves- dressed like wizards trying to pass themselves off as muggles. They’re convinced that rain means heartbreak somewhere and have no concept of how weird a five second pause in the middle of a sentence seems to the rest of us. Sometimes I can swear I catch them looking at a faucet like it’s some sort of new invention. Not in the awed oh-my-god-what-is-that observation, but in the running-water-how-quaint-I-shall-make-a-note-of-this kind of way.
They have no cell phone. They don’t use the Internet. They have no TV. They have no interest in who Judd Apatow is and they talk to homeless men on the subway. They give their heart willingly. They’re convinced people are inherently good. They get taken advantage of often.
I have depressing thoughts of a sentient race of aliens who landed here and disguised themselves to look like us. While here, they are robbed, lied to and laughed at. Their hearts are broken and we reveal to them who we really are as a species. But they just stand there and stare at us with quiet observation and amazement, much in the same way we look at gorillas and marvel at “how much they are like us.”
I really fuckin’ hope this is all in my head.
Actually, I tend to think they are time travelers.
